Love is such a big word. Yes ,it surely is. What defines love? I mean couple love. When you can’t live a day without hearing his voice or seeing him? When you miss him almost every single sec,minute or hour? When his welfare becomes more important than yours? When you care more of him than you yourself?
He did a lot for me. Just yesterday,I went for eye dilation and no worries,it’s just a normal eye checkup. But having done dilation,I wouldn’t be able to see near objects clearly for about 6 hours. During the whole process,he was there for me,worrying about this and that (though he said he is not worried) I know he was tired but I know he loves me more to leave me there alone. So I asked him to occupy his time by studying but he said he don’t feel like it. After I’m done with dilation and went out to the bright sunlight outside, my eyes are ….err….i don’t know how to say…it’s like when you wake up early in the morning while the sky is still dark and someone switch on your lights immediately. But that’s temporary,mine is for 6 whole hours. Then we couldn’t seem to find any auto to send us home and was forced to take taxi which is far more expensive. But he just can’t see me suffer like this so we took the taxi. He makes me feel so loved and cared of. He makes it clear that money is nothing if it means spending on me. He makes me smile and laugh when I’m down. He even teared for me (shhhh)
I’m grateful. Grateful to have him in my life. It’s true that sometimes I will feel a bit insecure like there is this uncomfortable and sour feeling in me, i could not tell. It’s not much of his problem,maybe it’s mine. But apart from that,I really hope is the the one for me and we will together prove that ‘happily ever after’ indeed does exist (;
Yes,life sure hasn’t been treating me well these days. The frequency of me visiting the hospital,to the opthalmology,dermatology,surgery and casualty to name a few. But no worries,readers,doubt u will worry though,I’m fine. Still able to sit in front of my lappy and type this. So smile cause u will never know when is your last day. Appreciate life because there is someone somewhere struggling to live a life like yours.
Block 3 exam results are out last week but I ain’t too happy with it. Sure,there is improvement in the 3 papers but it isn’t enough. Thus,I tell myself,Kwai Fern,don’t give up,you still have Block 4,like I always tell myself the same phrase after my Block 1 and 2,lol.
I am now 19+ years old (still a teenager:P) and I guess I now know who I want to live the rest of my life with. He has been there with me through the thicks and thins. He even told me if I ever go blind,he will donate one of his eyes to me so we both can still see with one eye. I was touched to tears upon hearing this. And no,I’m not naive,I trust him,I trust him that he will do that. Besides my parents,no one has ever treated me that good. I still remember those days when I cried cause I feel like I have no one here to count on to. But look,I have him. I don’t need a bunch of friends who sees me as fake and make negative assumptions of me . Yes,I’m fake but before you judge me,can you kindly look at yourself first and tell me how true you are? Everyone behaves differently when you’re with different people. So guess that’s your definition of fake. I begin to learn not to care what others think of me. But I still do care,just a little bit lesser than I previously do.
Cause what matters is my family and him. I don’t need a bunch of people to keep me contented. I just need a few like Ms Josephine Ho who never fails to make me laugh out loud every single day of our highschool life. We gossips about our friends:P,teachers or even the canteen or cleaner aunty. Oh ya,and not to forget our pathetic life. I could still remember me calling you every single day after class just to crap about almost everything from homework,gossips to important decisions. I would never forget those days. Thanks for being part of my life,Jojo cause you surely did leave footprints in my heart :’)
If you want to keep your girl, you got to reassure her. Don’t let her forget that you love her, and that there is no one that can replace her. Because girl get jealous n the second guess every move you made, they think too much. But they can’t help it, it’s in their natue and it’s your responsibility to prove your love to her. there’s plenty of other beautiful girls out there n she knows that. Make her believe that she’s the only one for you. Quoted from mel which I believe she took it from twitter (:
And yes,I do feel jealous,sometimes. Well who doesn’t? Haha,anyway,this post isn’t really about this topic. It’s more about life and death. Death. Biggest fear of most of us I believe. No? Don’t lie please. Death is a fear because of the fact that we don’t know what’s gonna happen to us after death. Heaven? Hell? Or somewhere far up above? No one really know anyway. I lost my grandma few months back and I could still reminisce the moment of agony and pain I went thru when I got to know about the news. And my parents lied to me at first. I know that’s because they don’t want to affect my emotion during exam period but does that make me feel any better? NO! But I could imagine how my mum feels when she is forced to fake a smile in front of me when we skype but in actual, she is crying in the inside :(
My mum told me her biggest regret is marrying my dad,LOL. Okay,that’s not very funny. My dad is quite a pleasant person. Notice the word ‘quite’. Hehe. I was just joking. I mean the biggest regret part. It’s not being able to see my grandma before her last breath. Ouch :’(
Death is inevitable. Everyone is bound to go thru it. I can’t imagine my parents,my brother and my beloved leaving me to another world. I can’t imagine myself leaving them either. That feeling of parting with them forever sucks. But some people take comfort by telling themselves that they are gonna meet them soon in their afterlife. But how true is that? We never know. Oh well,I think I shall stop craping about this and start studying my neuroanatomy before I’m dead for my 4th block. Wish me luck! And oh,in case if u’re wondering why suddenly I brought up this topic,it’s because I had a talk on such matter earlier of the day. Lets all enjoy life as we can and stay positive. Optimist in making here speaking,erhem:P bye :)
A 6 letter words,friend. How would u define friend? Someone who is there for u whenever u need him/her or someone who never fail to cheer u up whenever u’re down? Neh,neither. A friend to me,is deeper than that. I have finally learnt the true meaning behind that word,today.
I could still remember when I was standard 6 and instructed to write a letter to a teacher on what problems are we facing that time,one of it was not having a true friend. The reply I received was ‘Am I being a true friend to the others in the first place? ’ At such tender age,I didn’t give that question much thought about it but when I am slowly growing up,I actually realised u need to treat people how exactly u want to be treated back.
I did. I don’t expect u to be there for me when I drop down the drain or got splashed by water. pfft. I just want a genuine friend who wouldn’t doubt our friendship. Is that too much to ask for?
